October 19, 2006

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things about Melissa

1. I'm sick again. This time I have a head cold. My whole body hurts. My teeth hurt. My eyes hurt. My sinuses are going to explode and it feels like I have dirt in my throat. Apparently my immune system doesn't like me.

2. Richard got Splinter Cell 4 last night. He was up until 7 a.m this morning playing said video game. The bass on the surround sound is so loud, I thought the helicopters were really in our house. Oh the terror. Oh the sounds of war. Or maybe that was just the medicine I was on.

3. It has been raining for days. At 2:30am I could hear someone banging on our door. I don't know how Richard didn't hear them, maybe the sound of helicopters and guns shooting damaged his hearing. After banging twice she about kicked down the door. The neighbor said there was water in her basement and told him to "check your "sump" pump. He repeated, "Sump pump? My sump pump?" She glared at him and walked back to her townhouse.

4. My first thought, wasn't about the water that was probably all over our basement floor and the countless things that are ruined, but cripes, my kitchen is a mess and she probably saw it. Darn teenage boys, you tell them to do the dishes and....

5. I couldn't get back to sleep so I watched an episode of Zola Levitt Presents. I'm still sad he went to be with the Lord before I got to go on a tour to Israel. I miss his teaching. I'm a selfish person. To be with Christ is far better then this mucky life.

6. At 4:30am I was rummaging through the cupboards looking for some sort of medicinal relief. I found Benadryl and Imodium AD. Where was that when I needed it back when I lost five pounds in five days from the runs?

7. I gained those five pounds back and some. I'm bootylicious baby.

8. Richard asked me if this is what our home schooling days are like. Me sitting on the computer while the kids do whatever. I told him no, but they don't usually have to listen to the sounds of helicopters, grenades going off, and men of war screaming at each other. Does he really think anyone is going to get any work done with him home today anyways?

9. Vinny is tired of being in his crate. He is starting to put his paws up to fight his way out of the kennel when we put him back in. I hope his pins can come out of his elbow soon and he can walk around again like a normal puppy. Plus I want to dress him up in sweaters and a batman costume.

10. Am I almost done yet? I need to lay down.

11. Mooch is watching the Simpsons on her portable DVD player she got for her 13th birthday. Tchah. I hate when the kids watch that DVD Richard has. I'm going to hide it with all the other stuff I hide around here. wicked cackle

12. I have to close tonight at the restaurant and I so don't want to go. I can barely talk and I'll be blowing my nose every five minutes. That should be real appetizing to those who have just eaten.

13. I GOT A NEW CAMERA!!! A digital SLR!! I'LL STOP SCREAMING AT YOU NOW. It's just that I'm like-so-totally psyched. The only drag is that one of the lenses has a few small scratches and I haven't had enough time to figure out how to use the thing. I can't wait though.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

October 12, 2006

A Bloglift

I'm sure you've noticed my blog has gotten a bit of a face lift. I still haven't found a blog design or designer that I both like and can afford. I'm the classic perfectionist. And I'm too lazy and busy to do it myself. But I hated everything about the lame looking blogger template. It didn't help with my disinterest in blogging.
  • Eventually I'll also transfer any old archives from another online journal that I kept back when I was pregnant in 1999. I'm just too busy to mess with it or scan in old pictures to my flickr account. I also have to include entries from when I first moved here to Wisconsin.
  • I went through my blogroll and dumped dead links. If you're not on the blogroll and you know you should be let me know. I don't mean to leave anyone out, just trying to clean things up a bit.
  • I added my Stylehive badge. You should get one too.
  • I switched to Beta Blogger.
  • I added my Bake Space link, let's see how long it is before I use it.
  • I've added del.icio.us since many have complained you couldn't add me.
  • I changed my flickr badge since many people said they preferred seeing bigger thumbnails of my random images
  • I added my frappr map, although I'll admit I hardly check it. I'm sorry if you think I've ignored messages, emails, or requests. Just can't keep up.
  • I've decluttered my blog and added new colors
  • I'm currently working on getting up a new title bar

And I think it's safe to say, I'M BACK. Thanks for understanding my need to disappear. Thanks for your friendship, compliments, and coolness.

October 11, 2006

Customer Service in "America"

Has anyone else noticed that customer service isn’t really customer anymore? I might as well be dialing 1-800-Thick Indian Accent.

I realize everyone around the world deserves a good job which is lucky for them that more and more American companies are turning into cheap bastards. It’s so very kind of them to help our fellow global citizens by giving them our jobs at salaries as low as $2 a day. But do I really need to learn another language or get an interpreter to find out why my cell phone ring tones won’t work or why my bank statement says I’ve been charged $1087 for a money order? Call me a beeotch or racially insensitive but I really don’t like discussing my personal banking with someone that mostly has no clue what I’m saying and might not like me by the time the phone call is over.

The Husband surprised me by ordering a digital camera for me at buydig.com and it has been nothing but a hassle. First they didn't put the credit card info through right. Then we realized through our own investigation that the amount was over my check card limit. I didn’t want to deal with getting the bank to adjust the limit so I call and cancel the order to start over. By this time, the fun of being surprised with a fantabulous new camera was turning into frustration. Eventually my bank flags the card for possible fraud since they had screwed everything up by putting the wrong info through more then three times.

When I’m a big annoyed I can at times behave something like Carrie from King of Queens. It isn’t always pretty, but life I kept reminding myself that it wasn't an emergency. I called the company and apparently buydig.com has only two people working their "customer service" department. The first man was Indian. I couldn't understand a word he was saying. He kept saying 'yes' and 'good' a lot.

But how is it good? I don't understand you and you clearly don't understand me. It was quite close to my home life with three teenagers only probably a bit more annoying. At this point , I think it was easier to potty train four children than it was to understand one word he said. Does he mean yes or does he mean no? The husband works with Indians and he has introduced me to several of his Indian friends. Some have an interesting habit of saying yes and then shaking their no back and forth. Needless to say it's a bit confusing. Sort of like when people here give you the thumbs up to something when really they’re saying, “That’s great. I could care less!”At least when you can see the person you usually have the ability to dicipher sarcasm disguised as sincerity. I just didn't understand anything this nice guy is trying to tell me and I know he's just trying to do his job.

The phone call started off innocent enough with a pleasant hello. Then he mumbled something incoherent about an order number.

Me: It’s 123409, but I can't understand you very well. What do you need again?

Him: Badahbahdah-bahd-a-bahd-abah-help you?

Me: Um, I can't understand you. Did you get my order number?

Him: Yes, yes. Help you please?

Long and awkward silence

Me: So, um, can I talk to someone? I'm sorry, but I can't understand you.

Him: Yes, yes, yes. Yes, very good.

Me: So, are you transferring me?

Sound cliche? That's exactly how it went though.

Please is a word used very liberally in these phone calls, even if it seems to be used in a way that suggests the person has no idea what they're really saying. It just must make us feel better to hear please by a person that currently has access to some of our most personal and vital information, right?

Then every single phone call after that was with a pleasant woman I'll refer to as Vampire Girl. I kid you not; it was like I had stepped into the twilight zone where old actresses from cheesy vampire movies spend out their days working the customer service circuits of internet companies located in New Jersey.

"I vant to take your oooordawr numberrrrrr. Please."

I was beginning to feel that we were playing some sort of phone game I wasn't privy to. It was a bit surreal at the moment, but I had to laugh at it later. Laughing is something I do to keep from crying or acting like a crazy person.

One camera-ah ah ah.
Two CS agents- ah ah ah.
Three mistakes-ah ah ah
Four hours on the phone- ah ah ah
Five different phone calls- ah ah ah.
Absolutely zero customer service-ah ah ah

Wait von minute. Since when is buydig.com employing Transylvanian vampires? It wasn’t just like she was from that area, it was like she was trying to talk a vixen from a vampire movie. Her accent was insanely thick and the whole time I’m picturing Elvira with fangs on the other line. I worked hard on my gracefulness. I so wanted to ask her why I couldn't just talk to someone else. But she was holding my camera hostage and she had my credit card number, even if she didn’t know how to use it. Plus, I'm all out of silver bullets.

By this time it was later and I pondered whether it would sound really rude if I asked if she was the only one ever there. Like, is she in charge of the graveyard shift at the customer service desk or something? No pun intended.

I say this because every time I’d hang up to call my bank (who incidentally said every thing was okay on my end) I’d call back only to get HER on the line again.

Whispering past the phone, "Honey, it's vampire girl again. Don't they have anyone else working there? I just talked to her."

The poor lady had had no idea what she was doing and from her own omission there was no one else to help her figure it out. By the time I spoke to that same woman five times in one day I was beginning to think this was some fake company and perhaps this was my husband’s idea of a joke. I googled them just to make sure that The Husband didn’t give our credit card number to some Cracker Jack company. Buydig is for freal. They just have lame customer service. You'd think a worldwide company like that would have more then one person on duty to take calls.

All is well that ends well and after two days of nonsense my camera is supposedly on its way. I can't vait.

October 05, 2006

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen Things about Melissa

1. Last night my husband and I got into a fight. It's the second day in a row that we're bickering, arguing, and saying mean things. Let's just say he's trying to quit a nasty habit and he's obviously cranky and moody and I've been with him way too long to put up with it. I know I need to let God work on me in this area of my life, but it's hard. I have a hard time putting up with attitudes and if you start calling me names, or be ugly sarcastic or insulting, I'm likely to give you a piece of your own medicine. Yeah, I got be that biatch. I think I fed up two days ago and hollared, "Um, hello? You know me well enough to know that I'm not the kind of girl that's gonna put up with that BS. You must have me mistaken for another wife. Don't ever raise your voice to me or tell me what to do!!" Of course I feel bad though that I wasn't the ultra amazing patient Proverbs 31 wife. Pfffft.

OK, here's the deal. That part was true, but he's my man and I hate when we fight. I had anxiety about it all last night and I got hives on my wrist. I've never had that happen before. I sent him an email; he was asleep already though because he tends to pout ignore people when he's mad and he goes to sleep, regardless of whether or not it's four in the afternoon. This morning he didn't answer me when I asked him a question--oh no, is he inheriting his father's shunning tacicts? I think my mother-in-law said one of the things she hated about her ex-husband was how long he'd drag things out and how he'd ignore her sometimes for days. That's sad. I have to work tonight and I don't want to leave when we're being stupid like this.

Richard, I love you. I hate when we fight. Stop being a poopeyhead and let's be nice.

2. My camera has officially died. About 6 months ago it was dropped when Mooch came running at me to see the golf ball sized hail falling down outside. I was trying to get some pictures and next thing I knew it was on the ground with the lense dented in and crooked. That was the second time that had happened and my super genius husband got it back in both times. I'm surprised I was able to take any pictures after that, but even so the quality was noticibly poor, even for a Kodak Easyshare camera. I crave taking pictures. Photography is one of my passions and the last year or so I'm really trying to improve and not just take snapshots. Richard said he's going to buy me a new camera this weekend, but now I don't know.

3. I've discovered I really like custard style yoplaits. I realized this when I didn't eat any real food for about four days last week when I had a stomach bug. Lemon and boysenberry and cherry--oh my.

4. Tomorrow is Mooch's 13th birthday. I'm both excited and sad about it. People, children do truly grow amazingly fast. Don't take one day or stage for granted. Think about it like this, at six years old your child is at the half way mark for being a preteen. At nine years old, they are half way to being eighteen. Thirteen seems so far away when your preschooler is 3, but I promise you it goes extremely fast.

5. It's really cold here today in southeast Wisconsin, but I love the Fall.

6. I've lost 10lbs in the last 2 months or so.

7. I'm working tonight and I have to close. I hate closing, the night drags on and I don't get out until about 11pm. I really don't like coming home to see I've missed a whole evening with my family. Oh well, I'm doing what I can to help my guy get ahead on the bills.

8. I love Christmas. I'm already looking forward to baking cookies, Christmas hymns, decorating, making ornaments, driving around while looking at lights, family favorite Christmas movies, and adding new traditions.

9. I'm running out of things to say.

10. I have bad posture. I can see that I'm slouched over this keyboard and I need to stop it or I'm going to keep shrinking and become a hunchback.

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


October 04, 2006

Can someone remind me...

Why I've chosen to stay home and homeschool all day. And what was I thinking having so many of children so close together. And when do they start acting like human beings with coginitive abilities, common sense, and reasoning skills and less like little punks. And why must they eat all the toilet paper? Is it really too much to ask to have toilet paper last longer then 16 hours.

Where is it all going? How come they don't understand that you're not suppose to clean mirrors with it, clean your ears out with it, wrap your body in it; stuff your bra with it, clean the cat with it, fake a broken arm with it, decorate the banisters with it.

Oh, and can someone ask God to have me exempt from ever getting a stomach bug for the rest of my life? I think five days of puking and other unmentionable things is enough for one lifetime. The kids got sick for one day, but I was half dead when it was all over. I ended up in the E.R where some young, fairly cute E.R doctor was asking me about my bowel movements.

And what was the upside of that whole ordeal-cause you know I always like to see the positive in things-well I lost five pounds. As if it's going to stay off, its cruel I tell you, just plain cruel.